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Weaponized Scripture - How Biblical Literacy Can Save Trauma Survivors from Spiritual Abuse

• Tabitha • Season 1 • Episode 18

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If you've ever had Scripture twisted to keep you silent, ashamed, or stuck in an abusive relationship, you are not alone. In this episode of Hey Tabi, licensed trauma therapist Tabitha Westbrook breaks down why biblical literacy is a critical part of healing after abuse, coercive control, and spiritual harm.

You'll learn:
📖 What true biblical literacy is (and why it's different from memorizing random verses)
❌ How abusers misuse Scripture to manipulate and control survivors
✝ Why understanding the Bible for yourself can be a powerful tool for reclaiming your voice and your faith
🙌🏼 How to try out different Bible translations to find the version that feels safest and least triggering for your healing journey

If you’ve struggled with spiritual abuse, religious trauma, or confusion about God's heart for you, this episode will equip you to take your first gentle steps back toward truth, safety, and hope.

🎧  If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information!

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💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com
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🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com

💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com
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👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information!

🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

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Tabitha Westbrook:

If you've ever had scripture twisted against you to keep you silent, obedient or ashamed, you're not alone. Today we're talking about how reclaiming biblical literacy isn't just about knowing your Bible. It's about reclaiming your freedom, your faith and your future. Welcome to hey Tabby, the podcast where we talk about the hard things out loud, with our actual lips. We'll cover all kinds of topics across the mental health spectrum, including how it intersects with the Christian faith. Nothing is off limits here and we are not. Take two verses and call me in the morning. I'm Tabitha Westbrook and I'm a licensed trauma therapist. But I'm not your trauma therapist. I'm an expert in domestic abuse and coercive control and how complex trauma impacts our health and well-being. Our focus here is knowledge and healing. Trauma doesn't have to eat your lunch forever. There is hope. Now let's get going.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Welcome to this week's episode of hey Tabby. I'm super glad that you're here and hopefully you are settling in to the fact that we are going to talk about the Bible today pretty directly, and I wanted to do this because one of the things I've been finding as I work with people is that they had scripture weaponized against them and then it makes it really hard to enter back in with the Bible. When abusers use scripture as a weapon against someone, it can really mess up their relationship with God and their relationship with the Bible, and it can be really hard to pick the Bible up again and to even hold it in your hands, for example, and, honestly, the Bible was never meant to be a weapon that was used against you, and knowing what it actually says, like in full, can actually change everything. I'm going to give you a little bit of one of my own stories of harm that used scripture as a weapon. So I was in a situation with a very serious, really abusive pastor.

Tabitha Westbrook:

This individual controlled, honestly, almost all aspects of my life. There were so many things that they had input in that they really shouldn't have, but I didn't know that at the time. One of the things, however, one of the good things that came out of this was he had dared me to read the Bible cover to cover. At the time this is 25 years ago now I had not done that, even though I'm a pastor's daughter. I grew up in the church. I knew a ton of scripture. I had never read from Genesis to Revelation, and so he dared me to do that, and I will take many dares if they are not illegal or immoral, and so I said, okay, yes, I will. And that actually proved to be the thing that ended up getting me out from under this individual's influence. So I was dared to read it in six months.

Tabitha Westbrook:

And this is back in the day, right 25 years ago. We didn't have apps, we didn't have any of those things. So it was this little card that you got that unfolded, and it had all of the reading plans, and so I just doubled them up so that I could finish them in just under six months, and I remember having a pink highlighter. I wish I still had that piece of paper with all of this on it, but I would highlight the scriptures as I read them. And I finished on New Year's Eve of that year and handed it over to him and said, see, I did it Now, though he was coercively controlling. I ended up making this a habit of my life and I have read the Bible cover to cover every single year since then, and so I'm on my 25th reading of that, and I'm not saying this to say that I am cool or special or super holy or any of that. I'm saying that it actually totally was what got me out of abuse with this individual, and let me explain, because I knew scripture so well.

Tabitha Westbrook:

There was a point at which God opened my eyes to the things that were going on, and we'll talk more about that in a minute. So, first of all, I use the term biblical literacy, and I want to make sure that you understand what I mean. So, when I say biblical literacy, what I mean here is understanding the true context, the meaning and the purpose of scripture. So I'm looking at it as a whole. I'm studying the Bible well. I'm understanding the nuances that are in it to the best of my ability. Now, look, we're not going to be able to understand everything. I mean, have you read Ezekiel? It's a lot, and I know, though, that the more that I do it and the more that I study the word of God, the more I'm going to be brought into understanding by the Holy Spirit.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Now, this is not about memorizing verses, though I do have a significant amount of scripture memorized now, and I think that is a wonderful practice to have if that is something that you feel the Lord drawing you into. What I really mean is just the true understanding. It's about knowing the heart of God in the scriptures. The scriptures point us to him and I think sometimes we get told in church that it's like an owner's manual, you know, like if your carburetor goes out, you like flip to the carburetor section of the Bible and fix it or something. But that's not really what it is. What it does is it shows us the Lord, and then it bears weight in our lives and shows us how to go back to God, or it shows us God's heart for us. There's so much there, but it's really a picture of God and his relationship with us and that's the most important aspect of it. And when we don't have good biblical literacy, it makes it easier for abusers to weaponize scripture.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I think back to the Reformation and Martin Luther when he finally read the scriptures for himself, going wait a second. This is getting distorted Now. He was not a perfect man by any means, but he is the person who nailed to the door of the church the 99 theses and what started the Protestant Reformation. And really the Catholic church at the time was using its knowledge of scriptures to lord it over others because they couldn't read. They didn't have access to the Bible even if they could, and the printing press really changed that right. It gave us all access and even though different translations are a whole thing and we'll talk about that in a minute it really does give us access to see what God is saying to us.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Now I know that there is a lot of argument out there on whether scripture is inerrant or not and I am just not going to get into that today. I'm going to tell you it's really helpful for healing and it's really helpful for keeping you from being spiritually abused again. So we're going to talk about that and if you are a survivor, you know things like submit can get really distorted. Right, like wives, submit to your husband, but it oftentimes isn't quoted in context where they go back to the beginning of Ephesians 5 and talk about submit to God, submit to each other. It doesn't talk about the other verses geared to the husbands. When we just take one section and if all we've ever been told, as we've come up in the church or in our marriage, this is what the scripture says and you have to do that and we've never heard any of the things around it we are going to have the real big chance of being led astray.

Tabitha Westbrook:

And I will say abusers like to use spiritual and biblical illiteracy to make them seem more important and make them seem authoritative, and also then they use it to manipulate and to coerce and to control. And I will say this is from Schoolhouse Rock back in the like 80s and 90s. Knowledge is power. The more that we know the Bible for ourselves, the more it is going to be challenging to use it against us, and I think that's really important, especially if you do go into places and become advocates and that sort of thing. So I want to just again notice that scripture often is used against survivors. You've heard me say it before, if you listen to this podcast, that my definition of spiritual abuse is taking someone's good and right devotion to God and using it as a weapon against them. So a lot of times I will hear about abusers that have maybe gone to seminary or are pastors, elders, deacons you know someone who's maybe read the Bible but is using pieces of it. I've had so many survivors whose spouses are high up in church structure, like pastors or deacons or elders, saying, well, they went to seminary, so they must know how to interpret it, and I'm like, not necessarily they know how to weaponize it. If they're using it against you. You don't have to go to seminary to figure out how to interpret the Bible. There actually is really great stuff out there online, and I'll give some resources for that in just a few minutes as well.

Tabitha Westbrook:

The misuse of scripture is often used to justify control, to excuse abusive and coercive behaviors and to silence someone's suffering. How many times have women heard just suffer silently? Have women heard just suffer silently? You're suffering, like Jesus to keep them in an abusive situation? That is not the heart of God by any stretch of the imagination. Yet if we don't know for ourselves that that is not what the word says in those ways and the stuff around those passages that get pulled out of context, then we don't have a way to go. Wait a second, it doesn't say that and we end up taking it in thinking, yeah, yeah, this, this must be it. I mean, they know they went to seminary.

Tabitha Westbrook:

There is a joke for folks who have been around, folks that been in seminary, that it is also called cemetery, because you go in there and your actual relationship with God dies. Now, look, that is a joke. I have known wonderful men and women who've gone to seminary and did not come out hating God and thinking that he's not really real, or just being so sick of reading scriptures or anything like that. There are some that do and many that don't. But obviously, when we misuse the word of God and we're using it for our personal gain, we are way off, way off. That should never be what we're doing, and I know that if you're like dude, I don't even know if I can pick up a Bible right now, you're in good company. I totally get that. I have lots of survivors that I work with who are like I picked up the Bible and threw it across the room, then felt guilty about throwing it across the room because it had been so deeply distorted for them and it made it really difficult to even enter back in.

Tabitha Westbrook:

So this may not be the first thing that you do in healing I just want to say that but I do think that this ultimately really really helps you because you do start to see the character of God. You see that he is a defender of the oppressed, that he is near to the brokenhearted. You get to see that he is not a fan of oppression at all. In fact, he says real harsh things to people who lead the sheep astray, and that is something that, when we are in those dark places, we can hold on to and say, oh, but I know who he really is. I know his heart and his character. We also really can lean in that he doesn't condone abuse or coercion or harm. He came to end oppression and to set the captives free, and if you've ever been in an abusive, coercively controlling situation, you know that you feel like a captive. In fact, we call it when we teach advocacy class a captivity crime. It is very similar to being a prisoner of war and how it impacts your body.

Tabitha Westbrook:

If you don't know what the Bible really says, someone else will always try to tell you who God is, and the thing is they might be wrong or flat out lying to you. Now I'm not saying you're going to study the Bible and you're going to get it perfectly and you're going to go. Yes, I know all the things. That's just not how this works, let's be honest. But we are going to have a much better understanding. There is so much that you can study in the Bible and learn and know and grow in, and I think when we do that, when we avail ourselves of that, we get to learn really cool stuff about God and go oh my gosh, man, I never thought about it that way. Or wow, lord, like this is really cool. And then sometimes we go. That is a really weird story and I don't know what to do with that. I just want to normalize all of that about the Bible.

Tabitha Westbrook:

One of the things that I see very often in practice is that particular versions of the Bible get weaponized the most. So I would say the ones I see the most are the King James Version, the New King James Version and the English Standard Version. So the KJV, the NKJV and the ESV are the ones I tend to see most weaponized against others. Now, you can have any version weaponized against you by a wicked person. Anybody can pull a piece of a scripture out or one verse and tell you things, but those are the three translations that by far I see have the biggest issues. I will say and this is my personal opinion, you can come to a different conclusion if you like that the ESV in particular really has missed the mark in some ways. It's a more recent translation. There are some things that are gendered in ways I don't think that they should be, and so you can go do that deep dive if you're interested in that sort of thing. I am least comfortable right now with that version.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I grew up on the King James Version and the New King James Version. In fact, my very first Bible was the New King James Version. It was a Pink Precious Moments Bible. I still have it. I read it so much that Mark to Revelation fell out. It just literally fell out and I had to shove it back in there because I'd used it so much. But there were so many scriptures that were weaponized against me in that version that it at one point was extremely difficult for me to read and to think through without getting extremely activated. And that might be the case for you with any number of versions. So if it's been hard for you to pick up a Bible in your house or in your vehicle or wherever it is that you have that, then I get that. It can be really difficult because it brings up all those memories, especially if you went to a church that is high controlling as well. Then you may have a million different feels on this and it's very difficult.

Tabitha Westbrook:

But when you're ready, I want to encourage you to consider ways to enter back in. One is experimentation. So I want to encourage you to experiment with different versions, and one of the coolest things is that on our phones these days we have like every version. You can get it in multiple languages. If you would like to read the Bible in Spanish, you can do that. It's fantastic. If you don't speak Spanish, it might be hard to know what it says, but you can do it in so many different ways. So if you're like I don't want to go out and buy 12 different Bibles to figure out which one's not going to activate all the trauma responses, totally get that. But YouVersion, the Bible app, is really helpful. If you're like, wait, that app alone triggers me because who knows what's happened, I don't know your story Then pick another app that has multiple versions of the Bible available to you and try scriptures that you're familiar with in different versions.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Now look all of them. Translate Jesus wept as Jesus wept. Right, I mean, it's going to be the shortest verse in any translation. But try different passages in different translations. So, for example, you might take a look at the New Living Translation or the NLT in Psalm, let's say, 27. And you might read Psalm 27 in the New Living Translation, the King James Version, the New King James Version living translation, the King James version, the New King James version, the ESV and the Christian Standard Bible, or CSV, and see which ones feel the best to your body and if any of them, if you're like I can't, they're all too close, oh my goodness gracious.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Then try, maybe the message. So maybe take a look at Psalm 27 in the message and see how that reads, because the message is done more story related. It's definitely a thought for thought, not word for word translation, and it has a bit more of a poetic feel to it. So a lot of times, survivors I work with are able to access the message better and able to start to read a little bit at a time in that version and and again, you don't have to just go, okay, I'm going to go read the entire word of God this year. Enter in slowly, right? I want you to be safe as you're doing this. I want you to consider what's happening in your body and be noticing it and don't do it out of duty, right? God understands where you are and he wants to hang out with you, so he's not going to be like you know what? You only spent five minutes reading the message today. I don't know what we're going to do with that. He's going to be like hey, I'm here, I get it. You were really harmed and I hate that that happened to you and I want to help you heal. That's really his heart toward you.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Another one that I use all the time is the Jesus Storybook Bible. You heard that right and yes, that is a children's Bible, but it's a really, really well done children's Bible. It's my favorite one that I've ever had and yes, I do, in fact, as a grown adult, have that Bible and we have them in our offices because sometimes it is the most accessible way for someone to begin looking back at the word of God. Now, look, you're not going to do deep theological study from the Jesus storybook Bible, but you are going to start coming back to the word of God and it does such a beautiful job of showing how the Bible points to Jesus and I think that that is a good thing.

Tabitha Westbrook:

And it doesn't overly sanitize. Now, it's not going to give you the great detail on the flood and like how really awful that was and all of that. It's not. You're not going to get all of those details or some of the darker stories and when you're trying to recover from trauma. Sometimes that's really good, and so you can look at that and read those things and just take it for what it is right. It's a really easy, very segmented. You can read one story, it's a few pages, and that is just a great way to enter back in. And one of my favorite lines of all time comes from that one, and it is that Jesus is making all the sad things come untrue Because when he comes back, it is going to heal all the broken, and I think that that concept is super important and it really speaks to that throughout the entire book, and so I recommend definitely getting the Jesus Storybook Bible.

Tabitha Westbrook:

And if you're like well, I can't really carry around the children's book, I hear you especially if you're an adult who doesn't have children, I can see how that might feel a little bit weird. But I would encourage you maybe get a digital reading app. Perhaps even your library has it for download and that can be another thing that you can do to start orienting yourself back to the word of God and building your biblical literacy muscle, and really it's okay to temporarily set it aside if it's just having a hard time for you and you're like maybe I'm not quite ready for it yet. Another tip that I will give you on this as well is to find something that helps you study the Bible, and what I mean by finding something, finding a rhythm and something like Jen Wilkins' books on studying the word of God can be really helpful. I think Jen presents the way that you study the Bible in such a clear and beautiful manner.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I am a big fan. I think her theology overall is quite good. I've listened to quite a bit of her stuff and done a number of her Bible studies at this point and I found them to be very solid. I have found her to be a very credible source, particularly for women who have been harmed. Now, I know that maybe not everyone feels that way, but that is just one example of perhaps a place you could go. So if you've never actually even studied the Bible for yourself because sometimes you're not even allowed to do that you know your spouse won't let you have your own Bible or your abuser in your life will keep you from having access to these things. I know that I went to a church at one point that had a banned reading list like there were banned books and one of those was Beth Moore. We were not allowed to utilize Beth Moore studies, which was ridiculous, and I remember doing my first Beth Moore study and thinking, my goodness, I am breaking every rule All the rules are being broken here, but I found it to be extremely biblical, extremely theologically sound and have done a number of them over the years and I think you have to find, maybe, what your style is.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I will say that Jen Wilkin tends to use the ESV in a lot of the studies. So if that is a harder translation for you, you might just want to be aware of that going into it. But her how to study the Bible work is really, really good and you can always adapt something to the needs that you have. So if you're like man Jen is using the ESV to ask these questions or enter into this Bible study, I'm going to use a different one. I'll look at it just so that I kind of know where she's going. But I'm going to look at maybe the CSV and the Christian Standard Bible honestly is probably the one that I use the most right now. That is the one that is my go-to.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I also tend to gravitate for some things for the New Living Translation, depending on what I'm doing, but on what I'm doing. But again, don't do what I do because it works for me. Do what you need to do because it works for you. And the point is to know God's word and to know the heart of God. And we don't want to get dogmatic right. Dogma got us here, rigid rules got us here, where someone said this is what it is and they have to do it this way and that is not the heart of God.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I think that there actually are ways to come to very different conclusions. Sometimes we used to call them open and closed hand issues, and maybe people still do. I feel a bit like we're not very charitable in the world right now about talking about differing opinions and whatnot, but like an open hand issue would be tribulation. It doesn't have a thing to do with salvation. Salvation is all the closed hand stuff how we get saved, who Jesus is, all that stuff that we would say is closed hand. Everybody should believe roughly the same thing about that because it is orthodox to the faith. It's very clear in the Bible that sort of thing.

Tabitha Westbrook:

The things like rapture and tribulation are not, and I know that I grew up in a system that was what we would call pre-trib. So rapture was going to happen before the tribulation began, which would be like all the left behind books and all of that. You're now getting a little bit of insight on the way that I was raised. And then some people were mid-trib we would be raptured in the middle of the tribulation and some people were post-trib we would be raptured in the middle of the tribulation and some people were post-trib we would be not raptured. I don't know what was supposed to happen at the end of the tribulation, but everything happened after the tribulation took place and Christians were still around. And, man, there are some hot debates on that stuff. I don't know if you've ever done a theological deep dive and looked at the internet for some of that, but oh honey, it can be a lot.

Tabitha Westbrook:

Now, that's not the purpose of this podcast, but those are things that people can come to different conclusions and not be wicked. You can be pre-trib, mid-trib, post-trib, whatever, and still be completely orthodox in your faith and not be a heretic. And so I want to just say that there are different things and that we can wrestle with those things, and as we learn to study the Bible, things may change, and I'm going to use the tribulation and rapture as an example, because that is something that has changed for me. I'm pan-trib. It'll all pan out in the end. I used to be very solidly pre-trib before I did some study on my own, and I can't come to that place now in my own study of the Bible. Now that doesn't mean that I have gone liberal, become woke, whatever it is that someone wants to say about it. What it means is I read something and read it enough and prayed over it that I can't say with certainty anymore that pre-tribulation, rapture is a thing and that is okay, there's nothing wrong with that. And so I want to just give you that freedom that you might come to some conclusions that maybe you grew up in or raised in and go, oh my gosh, I don't, I don't know that I can come to that conclusion anymore.

Tabitha Westbrook:

One of them for me also was God hates divorce which. How many times do we hear that? But if you go and you read that entire passage in Malachi, you actually find that God hates men who are harming their wives and putting them out and going getting a younger honey, essentially from a nearby nation. And if you read that entirety, you go, oh, oh. It doesn't just say God hates divorce. Oh, because you've now read it for yourself and you've read it in context and you know what it says more fully. And that's really, really the gift of having biblical literacy.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I will be honest with you I don't know that churches in general some of them now, some are great. Please don't hear me say either, when I'm talking about church struggles, that I broad brush all churches. I have amazing pastor friends in my life. I go to an actual church and I don't think all pastors are terrible by any stretch of the imagination or that most pastors are trying to just do the wrong thing. But I do think that in the church as a whole, in a lot of places we don't have good biblical literacy, even in the leadership, and that's a shame and that's another reason for you to have it, because if you are trying to get out of a situation that is coercively controlling and scripture has been weaponized against you to try to keep you there, this gives you power, gives you the power of god to go. No, and if you are advocating for somebody, if you have excellent biblical literacy, you have a leg to stand on for everybody that goes to the call to peace advocacy class and hears me talk about scripture and unpack certain things and all of that stuff.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I have done that through study and I'm not the only person that can do stuff like that If we have a number of our training team that is right there with me on it. And it has been such a gift, not only to me in my own life but to survivors that I work with, for me to be able to go no, no, no, no, no that's that's incorrectly espoused upon Like we need to look at this differently. Let's look at it together in context, and it is not abnormal for me to pull out a Bible in a session and go let's look at this together and let's look at the whole thing. And then let's go here and here and here and cross-reference different things, and it is such a gift for you to be able to do that yourself. And again, this isn't an overnight thing. I'm on my 25th year of reading through the whole Bible, so it has taken me a long time to get to the place that I am, and you can get to that over time as well. And again, you can go in little baby pieces. You don't have to do this overnight, but it is such an important thing and such a big part of your healing because you will see the heart of God toward you to be able to grow in your biblical literacy.

Tabitha Westbrook:

So I want to just close this by inviting you to try just the tiniest bit to see if you hear a different tone in God's voice toward you. Sometimes we are taught to read the scriptures as if he's mad at us, and he's not. Why would he send his son to die for us if he was like just perpetually upset? Now does he get angry over wickedness? Yes, I would say, the person God is mad at is not the victim, but it is the perpetrator, without question.

Tabitha Westbrook:

And so I want to invite you to maybe look at a scripture that you're familiar with in a different translation and maybe hear the voice of the Lord differently in it. And again, just start small. It can be one verse, one chapter of Psalms, a simple prayer that says God, please help me just even open my Bible, because right now I would like to throw it across the room. One of my favorite scriptures is Psalm 34, 18, and that just talks about the Lord being close to the brokenhearted. He is near the crushed in spirit. So maybe take a look at that in two, three translations that are unfamiliar to you and write it down in each of those translations and then just let it sit with you and journal about your experience. And you can even journal about your experience in terms of what was it like to pick up the Bible, what was it like to open up the Bible app, what was it like to pick a different translation? Because, man, the first time I looked at the NIV, the New International Version, I thought I was going straight to Hades because I had been so indoctrinated that I was going to go to hell for reading the wrong translation of the Bible, because it wasn't the real one. The church I went to at the time called it the nearly inspired version, goodness gracious. And yes, some translations are better than others. But come on and so notice what happens in your body when you pick up a translation that maybe is new to you or foreign to you, and let that sit with you. And it is okay. If you're like there's a lot of activation, I'm going to stop for now. Come back to it, but give it a try and see what happens with you and see how it lands and over time you just make it bigger. Right, read two verses or a second chapter, and it doesn't have to be intense. Just little bits at a time and start to see the Lord's heart for you and start to know scripture for yourself in a different way, and that will make you very, very hard to control scripture ever again.

Tabitha Westbrook:

I hope that you enjoyed this episode of hey Tabby. I really hope that it was helpful. I hope that you take a couple of these things and give them a try. If you do, please be sure to reach out and let me know how it went for you. You can follow me over on Instagram at Tabitha the counselor. That's T-A-B-I-T-H-A the counselor. All one word, because Instagram right, and let me know what was it like for you. How was that experience for you? I would love to see what you find out for yourself. If you liked this episode and you found it helpful, please be sure to like it and to subscribe. It helps people who need it find it and I look forward to seeing you next time on our next episode of hey Tabby. Thanks for joining me for today's episode of hey Tabby. If you're looking for a resource that I mentioned in the show and you want to check out the show notes, head on over to tabithawestbrookcom, forward slash. Hey, tabby, that's H-E-Y-T-A-B-I and you can grab it there. I look forward to seeing you next time.

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